Wednesday, November 05, 2008

The Sadly Effect

For the first time in my life, I'm not totally horrifed to hear that country song "I’m proud to be an American." But I’m NOT proud to be a Californian. What kind of bullshit is that? Black is okay now, but fuck the gays? I guess they’re just afraid of the millions of Mexican lesbians who are going to come here for green cards.

I’m really happy that Obama won and that he crushed his nasty old opponent and his horrible mate. And I really hope that our democracy gets restored so I can vote when I'm old enough. I did get to vote in the mock election at our school (the Ronald Reagan Elementary School). Obama won, but there were a lot of idiots who voted for McCain cuase they said Sarah Palin was a hottie and they didn't want us all to have to be communists. I'm starting to think that maybe they are right to not believe in evolution because clearly they are not participating!

By the way, I don't know if I'm gay or not yet, but I'd like to have that option, thank you very much. And I know for sure that I oppose traditional marriage: that's where the husband's in charge and gets to make all the decisions and beat his wife and children and fart as loud as he wants to without saying excuse me.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Monday, July 28, 2008

Batman is a dickflick

Ok, before I talk about the movie I just want to point out something I noticed in the paper. there were two big ads next to each other. One for Batman and one for Mamma Mia. They both listed their stars like all movie ads and posters do. Batman had 6 men and one woman, and the picture showed only men. Mama Mia listed 4 men and 4 women and had a picture with all of them. The one with half women and half men is considered a chick flick, and the one that has 6 times as many men as women is considered to be for everyone. Just a normal human movie. What the fuck?

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Beyond Abu Ghraib: Soldiers Playing Doctor with Actual PIGS!!

I'm not dead, i was just gone for a long time, for a few reasons, most of which I cannot go into now or I will lose the "privilege" to do my blog again.

The military wants to shoot pigs with automatic rifles and then practice treating the wounds. If they're being attacked by the pigs so that they need to shoot them, then why do they want to learn how to fix the pigs? Seems to me if they don't want to have to worry about treating soldiers with big gun holes, then they should bring them back home and leave the pigs alone.

By the way, when they're done with shooting and playing doctor with the pigs, do they eat them or just throw them away? People give me crap for not thinking that humans are superior to all the other animals, but humans are the only animal I know of that shoot other animals and then practice fixing the holes.

Monday, February 04, 2008

Pet Mart

Okay, a couple of days ago I heard that there were two explosions at pet markets in Iraq, which is totally heartbreaking. As far as I can tell the animals aren't members of any tribe and have a hard enough life to begin with. Plus I think most of the people at the pet markets are nice animal-loving people (except for the few who are really getting them to eat). But THEN I heard the bombers were women and I was even more sad because I expect women to behave better. Women blowing up animals? that just ruins my whole way of seeing the world. But THEN I found out that it was really retarded (Down's Syndrome) women who didn't even know they were bombers: some men strapped the bombs on them and told them to go pet the animals. My world view was restored, but it is so horrible I don't know what to do. I love animals so much that if someone gave me a heavy vest and said I could go pet the kitties, I would. What is wrong with these men? And why doesn't anyone call it what it is? which is just old-fashioned male culture- which seems to be about terrorizing women and children and animals and smaller men.

That night I was trying to feel better and we rented Ratatouille, and that helped not at ALL! Because in the whole movie there was only one female character (except for the old lady with the shot gun at the beginning). Even the rats were all male. How do you have a whole colony of rats and they're all boys? Who gave birth to them all? or did they just kill off all the females before filming started (I know it's animated). Have the rats gone all Taliban? Even animation, where you can make up whatever world you want is the same old boy, boy, boy. The BEE Movie? That was all about boys too. I got news for you. Bee colonies are almost entirely female. Drones are females. There is no Jerry Seinfeld bee in real life. And me and my friends are totally sick of it. How come we're expected to watch and enjoy (and then ask for the related toys) all the shows that are about boys and boy characters, but if there's a girl character then only girls are expected to watch? Next thing you know they'll be strapping a vest full of bottle rockets and roman candles to a retarded girl and telling her to go play with the dolls in the American Girl store.

Someday I'm gonna make an animated movie, and it's going to be MY fantasy. I promise you THAT will be explosive.